Dear Mai,
I’ve been dating someone for six months, and he’s wonderful. The only issue is he’s not Hmong, and my parents are very traditional. They’ve already started pressuring me to find someone from within our community. How do I get them to understand that he makes me happy?
– Torn in Tradition
Dear Torn in Tradition,
First, let me say this: your happiness matters, and the person you choose to share your life with is ultimately your decision. That said, navigating family expectations in a traditional Hmong household can feel like walking a tightrope.
Start by sharing what makes him wonderful. Highlight his values, how he treats you, and how he respects your culture—if he’s learning about Hmong traditions, that’s a huge plus to share with your parents. Let them know this isn’t about rejecting your heritage but about finding someone who truly complements you.
But remember, change takes time. Be patient as they process this. Love, especially in our families, often grows when they see how happy and cared for you are. You’ve got this, sis—stand strong in your truth!
– Mai